On Being Gender Blind

Yes, the roleplay guide posts will resume shortly, possibly this week and next week.  I've been dealing with fun things in real life involving giving my blood to strange people so they can tell me all the things wrong with me.  (It turns out there's not much apart from inheriting my father's stubborn veins, thankfully.)  Of course, not having the time/energy to do the RP post doesn't mean other things aren't coming across my radar that I'd like to talk about.  This week the stars have aligned in such a way that something pinged more than once and I wanted to touch on it.

It started Monday with Brian Patterson's webcomic D20 Monkey.  The comic that day concerned one of the regular cast members, Jeannie, a woman who is, naturally, a gamer.  While by no means anything I'd term a feminist comic, Patterson does occasionally poke at the problematic elements of gaming and geek culture, and Monday was one of those days.  This time it concerned Jeannie's personal experiences as a table-top GM trying to put together a campaign.  It's pretty funny and, sadly, a bit spot-on regarding the sexism and immaturity many women have experienced, but it was the middle panel that got my attention the most.

D20 Monkey

Then, yesterday on Twitter someone lamented the fact that people feel the need to identify what sort of gamer they are by gender (and sometimes sexuality).  "Why can't we all just be gamers?" they asked.  The ideal gamer, the "good" gamer shouldn't see race or gender.  We should all be able to enjoy a game without mentioning our sexuality, our race, or our gender.  Sounds like a great idea, right?  It's not.

In social justice circles we often encounter the concept of color and other types of "blindness."  It's intended as a way of saying we're all equal and we're all human and should be treated based on our merits and accomplishments rather than the things that are beyond our control.  While definitely a laudable goal, this type of "blindness" ignores the very real fact that we can see skin color and gender.*  In fact, colorblindness is a form of racism because it ignores the historic and continued impact of racism in our society.  To be colorblind is to be in a position of privilege since those who claim colorblindness are often white and, thus, do not experience racism and don't always see the many ways racism affects the day-to-day life of non-whites.  Likewise, to claim you don't see gender in gaming is to ignore the very real fact that women must endure sexism and misogyny at every level in the gaming industry.

From artwork, to development, to stories, and even to the players themselves, feminist gamers see sexism and misogyny on an almost daily basis, not because we want to or we're looking for it, but because it's an extension of our culture.  It's more apparent to us because we've experienced it and can see a pattern, and we also know that sexism isn't always blatantly obvious to those who never have to worry about it (namely men).

The problem with asking me to shut up about being a woman who enjoys gaming is that there are men out there who genuinely believe women don't play video games, or that if we do, we're a small minority.  The reality is that we make up half the gaming market, but that is in no way reflected in the mainstream gaming industry.  Right now, I know women who hide their gender online because they fear harassment, and there are countless accounts from other women to provide more than enough validity to those fears.  And even when men in the industry are caught sexually harassing a female developer in such a way that no one can deny it happened, they are able to continue their careers with little or no penalty.  The issue isn't that these women exist in a way that makes it obvious they're women, the issue is that sexism and misogyny exist and that we allow it to continue.

When you say we shouldn't bring up gender in our identities as gamers, what you're really asking us is to pretend we're men.  You're really saying, "It makes me feel uncomfortable to acknowledge there are differences in how we're treated, bur rather than address the inequality I want you to act like it doesn't exist."

Pretending we're equal doesn't make us equal, and in doing so we only reinforce the status quo.  We must acknowledge the problems in our community, and we must address them if we want to see change.  If it makes you uncomfortable or maybe makes you feel somewhat culpable for not calling out the bad behavior when you see it, then good.  I want you to be aware of it.  I want you to feel icky because it means you're listening and you're realizing there is a very real problem.

It's important that I'm here as a woman.  I want game developers and creators to see me enjoying their games, and I want them to see women characters as more than plot devices.  I exist and that deserves acknowledgment.

* = I recognize not every person identifies as male or female, and that there are non-binary genders.  I'm addressing the fact that people assume gender on the basis of appearance, which in itself is an issue.